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newbullying theology

If you have never been in the place where it seemed like more was against you than it was for you, then, as older folks have told me, “keep living!”

When it seems like debts, disasters and decisions tend to be the thing that’s holding your dream hostage, it is an easy feeling to just blow off whatever that’s in your heart that’s good to do and just go on with your life.

Because of issues in our lives, many of us have simply stopped writing, blogging, drawing, speaking, teaching, preaching and much more.

And people suffer as a result of that.

I have 3 reasons that I can pull from the top of my head on why giving up is just not an option:

My Family Can’t Afford It!

No…seriously…as a husband, as a man…I can’t afford to just “give up!” It’s okay to take a break and really reflect, but, after you’ve prayed and cried, you have to have faith and go forward.

You have to make the choice to stand up even when you feel like sitting down.

Someone Is Watching!

Somewhere out there, I can imagine a young me, sitting somewhere on a computer or playing with their smartphone and running into a drawing on Instagram I did or an article I wrote.

Perhaps that kid is lonely, lost and filled with anxiety. This is the kid that needs to know that they are not alone and that they too can be encouraged to not “give up.”

And it’s not just kids…it’s adults too.

This is one of many reasons why I keep writing, drawing and creating stuff!

“Somebody is always watching” I’ve been told. That’s not to be taken as creepy. Fact is, you’re an example and an influence to somebody.

The Calling on My Life

When I don’t write or draw or create, it really, really bugs me. Even at my worst, there’s still something that just burns in me that says “yeah, I still want to do this! I must be a special kind of crazy!”

But, that’s awesome!

I believe that the Lord called me to the work that I do and I’m perfectly fine with that. I’m learning more and more about what I’m here on this planet for and it is amazing. It’s humbling.


What Do I Do To Get My Groove Back

On days that I just feel a sense of failure and wanting to throw in the towel, it is usually because I have not properly taken care of myself.

If I haven’t taken time to pray, read my Bible, rest and relax or even journal a little, I get a little cranky…spiritually, mentally and physically. These are my must have things to do FIRST to survive and accomplish anything and everything that needs to be done.

I also look at my schedule book, reviewing what needs to be done and what can wait.

And there’s something about just “DOING” something! Even if it is to go outside and get fresh air and take walks, the momentum of exercise really helps get things going.

Tuesday, I was reading a devotional on my Bible app and it got things for me going. I then passed on the lesson to my wife. Turns out, she needed a Word as much as I did.

Because of not giving up, I was able to be a blessing to somebody else!

And even if being a blessing to somebody else was all that was accomplished that day…then that was a pretty big accomplishment!

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Seeing God as Father

May 24, 2017

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Early Wednesday morning, I was writing in my journal while having a coffee in one of my favorite local shops in Garland, Texas. While writing, I was chronicling the experience I was having with the Lord for the past 24-48 hours.

 

Then, out came this narrative…a narrative that really described what I was experiencing.

The entire experience could be likened to that of a 16-year-old boy whose outrageously upset.

About what!? Sure, he’s a teenager. What could he possibly be angry about? It can’t possibly be THAT big of a deal. He’s a teenager. But, his Father doesn’t approach it that way. He’s got an issue…He meet’s his son where he is in his sons maturity (or lack there of) for that moment.

In the teens’ moment of anger, frustration and teenage angst boosted to 100 on a scale of 1 to 10 he sees that everything sucks…his life sucks…and he wants a do-over and feels totally mistreated and misunderstood. He wants things to work for him…but…he can’t see past his wants to see how good he actually has it. Sure, a couple of really awesome things are going on…but…he’s lacking a true view of how blessed he really is.

He stomps his way to his room and slams the door. In this story, the Father stops at nothing to get his son to talk. But, he knows that the boy has to cool down before really being able to reach him.

Once the son leaves his room and enters the space in the house where the Father often resides, the Father asks him to sit with him.

He wants his son to explain, specifically, what’s troubling him.

The young teen tries to use his words. His Father can read between the lines. He moves closer and wraps his arm around his beloved son. And in between the words come tears from his son. His Father asks his son to let him handle the problems.

Once the son and his Father talked it out, the son decided to trust again and love again.

And, he apologized for his attitude in the moment.

The son realizes that he was being pretty self-centered and selfish…but the Father was well aware of where it was coming from. And, he dealt with his sons heart…he dealt with the the legitimate aches with legitimate truth.

 

 

I’m so grateful for God being so patient with me and so loving and so kind. I’m grateful that He sent His son Jesus. I’m grateful that the Lord stops me before I make things become more about me rather than about HIM. I’m thankful and grateful that He loves me where I am and invites me into more in Him…a life that perpetually shows that Jesus is FIRST and ONLY.

When I actually seek the Lord FIRST I not only have nothing to worry about, but, I also stop worrying, period!

Matthew 6:33 says “But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.”

I’m grateful for the Lord loving me and disciplining me so I can actually come to a place of maturity in Him.

God and I in 2016

December 8, 2016

By and By - Growth in God

In the year 2016 I have seen God allow for doors to open and doors to close. I have experienced deep joy in some parts of my life and periods of deep sadness and disappointment.

Even major bouts of depression, wondering if I should give up on everything…hopes…dreams…goals…everything.

I went back and forth on whether I should’ve done this or that, or, maybe if I had only made this decision or taken this opportunity or gone this or that direction.

Those moments, I was angry…frustrated…lost…confused…hurt…even a little scared. I wanted things to happen in my life that were the complete reverse of what I was seeing. I was told to trust God and keep the faith but was hurting so much inside that I was numb to it.

Even as I write this its…to be honest…really uncomfortable…like “naked in public” type of uncomfortable. But, kind of refreshing at the same time.

Living for Jesus is hard. And yet, I’ll have it no other way.

Jesus freed me from a life where I walked in bitterness and anger towards my own race…towards my own people.

Jesus freed me from a life where I could’ve chosen to live any kind of way…to a life that said that He was all I need.

Jesus is tearing down the walls of my own agenda, making me rethink my life as a whole and totally rewiring my mindset. I

In this, I think of the scripture in Romans about being transformed by the renewing of my mind!

That is happening in a big way and I thank the Lord for every moment that transformation to be in His image is taking place.

Detective_Conan_Characters

For the past few days, I have been watching one of my favorite anime’s, “Case Closed,” which is also known as “Detective Conan.”

“Case Closed” is about a high school student, Jimmy Kudo, whom after being drugged by a crime syndicate and left to die, turned into an 8-year-old boy. Adopting the alias, Conan Edogawa, the famous young detective now has to solve crimes as a little kid while using his close friends’ father, whose a detective, as a cover and a way to find the men who poisoned him.

Humility

A gifted detective, masterful in deductions and all things mystery, Jimmy Kudo lived in the spotlight of popularity. Girls loved him. Men were jealous of him. People were amazed at his work at such a young age.

But, Jimmy Kudo, now known as 8-year-old Conan, was not humble at all. Kudo was so into his own world, his own interest and his own desires and the attention he was getting, he was missing out on the fact that ONE person really cared for him deeply, Rachel Moore, a girl he’s known since childhood. But, his focus was on the thrill of doing what he loved to do and the fame that came with it.

Then…everything changed. He was not careful enough. After being ambushed, he was knocked out and poisoned. He should’ve died, but the poison caused a side effect that turned Jimmy into who we now know as Conan. And to make matters more interesting, he’s forced to stay undercover under his new name at Rachel Moore’s house, where her father, Richard Moore, was a detective whose work was not all that great.

While watching the series, two things I noticed immediately. Both Jimmy Kudo (Conan) and Richard Moore had the same problem: humility. Jimmy lacked humility while he was brilliant in the art of detective work. Richard Moore lacks the intense skill that Jimmy has but genuinely believes he’s the best and is incredibly prideful.

Second, throughout the series, Conan is helping Richard solve every single one of his cases without him really knowing it. Throughout the series, this makes Richard Moore become the famous detective whom many will later know. Conan was the greatest. Now, Richard is the greatest.

Conan was literally humbled into a position that would require him to serve someone else in order for himself to be served. Conan understood that he wasn’t going to get to where he needed to go in life unless he helped Richard Moore go from mediocre to great!

Servant Leadership

I could only imagine the kind of heart and mind change it took for Jimmy Kudo, now Conan, to go from being a great detective who was admired by all to being a little kid.

At first, solving cases was just for personal interest. Now, it was a matter of life and death. It was a mission. There was a purpose behind it.

It was more than just for a rush and admiration. It was now all about determination and getting his real life back. But, he couldn’t become great again…until he became a child again.

What we can take from the series and from the main character is that to be the greatest is to be a servant.

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Being Like A Child

In Matthew 18:1-5, the disciples were discussing who would be the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven.

Much like Jimmy Kudo, the disciples saw the Kingdom of Heaven as a big prize here on earth, not something of higher, eternal value.

Jesus calls a little child to Him and set the child in the midst of them. He explains to them this:

Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Whoever receives one little child like this in My name receives Me.

The New King James Version. (1982). (Mt 18:3–5). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

Much like Jesus makes the point of being converted, which here literally means, “to change.” The Message Bible, as I paraphrase it here, says that unless you go to square one and start over like children.

Greatness comes from serving. Humbling yourself as a child is a part of the Kingdom of Heaven living style.